A hold on Things

To update this random blogger, that many of you won't read, I will write. Writing is something you do. Something that you are in hopes for someone else to read. But the truth is, i bet no one reads this. No one sits around and checks up on how i am doing. This is just simply a document that will be here. But sitting here, I realize. I dont want someone to sit here and read every single blog i have sent. I just want someone to know that I write. That if you did want to know something, I would write about it eventually. That I would then express it in my thoughts. That I would hate for someone to think this is boring.

Now, back to the real reason I am here.

I've recently don't have any idea of what to do with my [guy] social life. Formal. This is where it all started, sadly. Somehow I ended up dancing with this amazing person who now I am not so sure of. He made the night, oh how do I say this, a little more fun. But there was/is a rumor that he repulses me. This is something only a friend of me would know about. This is something more than just looks [even though I find he is better than people take him and that even though hes #1 on hot guys list, he is still pretty cute]. Crapplebees [I know haha], that night, served me Orange Chicken Bowl. Somehow:

Food+heat+extreme dancing+dehydration=barf

Although other people might think different about how I got to the barf, that's how it happened. Turns out, he thinks it was because of him. But yet, here I am to realize, NOT! Me and him were really close for a while, until this rumor got to him. This sounds stupid of me, but when he told me about it, I didn't say anything. So, as a guy, he thought it was true. I just kind of avoided him now and then. Not because I wanted to, but because of my friends.

What do you do when your friends disapprove?

What was I to do? So now, we finally talked last night. But not anything about that situation. Before the rumor, we talked for 89 minutes. I know, because I reviewed my cell phone bill and the biggest amount of minutes used was with him. Last night, I dont know, it was a start. But recently, he has a new fling. With someone who I don't exactly know that well. But i do know well enough, she's "better" than me. Not in the way some people think, though. She always perfect, in school and sports. He took her to prom. He runs with her now. What do I do?

Leave him?

Talk to him?

Listen to him?

What should i do? My friends are out of the question, they don't know. So, afterall, I will get through it. He is a senior and going to college, which happens to be the college i am destined to go to, because of many reasons. This sounds cheesy, but this is my thoughts:

my brain says, "Forget him, find someone else."

my heart says, "Talk to him, go after him."

my friends say, "Forget him, get revenge."

This event will be updated soon, if not, tell me to. Just check it out and see, because someone else out there is having the same problems.

--Just Mandi, still